Growing up, we all remember the friends we have made throughout our lives, whether that be childhood friends you still keep in contact with or the ones you made a few years ago. However, contrary to my previous statement, I never really had a solid group of friends until high school.
Like most of the media many of us consumed, there was always a group of friends doing anything together; like the popular shows “Friends” (1994-2004), “Saved by the Bell” (1989-1992) and “Community” (2009-2015) just to name a few. Unfortunately, life is not like the various TV shows we have seen. No matter how much we wish it was, our lives do not simply pause as the screen fades to black. Our lives still continue on, no matter what happens.
Like I have stated before, I never really had a solid group of friends until high school. Granted, I did have a few people who I considered friends and still do to this day, but high school is where I really found my close friends and community. High school is the place that many of us have a love or hate relationship with, but for all the drama and stress it caused, it also allowed most of us to find those we share interests or hobbies with. Like many, I joined a few clubs and got to meet and know some amazing people that I still have in my life. However, I mostly stuck to doing theater, which is still true even now as a second-year at Hamline when my schedule allows. But as we all know, nothing lasts forever, whether that be the high school experience or the friends we have made, and like most people, I hated that change.
Now, unlike the TV shows we have all seen, not all friends stick together outside the confines of high school. We all end up taking different paths and sometimes those paths diverge; some attend college outside of the state, take the year to travel or find work. It is not always easy going from seeing the same people every day to doing something big and new by yourself with your friends miles away. During my first year here at Hamline, I found a few communities to be a part of and I do not regret it for a second. I joined the Oracle after hearing about it from my advisor and I joined Hamline’s Performance, Production, and Community department (PPC) and through both I have met some pretty amazing people. Those people helped me grow not only as a person but also as an actor and student journalist. I am grateful to all of them not only for helping me grow as a person but also in helping me through that shift, whether they were aware of their impact or not.
While I can only speak from my own experience of coming to terms with only having a few friends compared to larger groups, there is something almost universal about navigating the shift from a huge friend group to just a small handful of people. While sometimes it is sad, it also provides a moment of growth for everyone, whether we like it or not. This shift allows us to find and forge new connections or strengthen ones we currently have. While meeting new people is often a little intimidating, there is something about finding new connections through a shared activity or hobby that leads you to meeting extraordinary people.
If meeting new people is intimidating for some, Hamline has various organizations that anyone can join if you want to find new people to connect with and create new friendships. Many of the organizations hold events that are for everyone and not just for their members; for example, some do movie or craft nights. There is no pressure to join a specific organization, but it is a good way to meet new people and possibly learn something about yourself, like having a small passion for journalism in my case. The shift in friendships does not only apply to those just coming into college, it applies to anyone. We often see this shift portrayed in films and TV shows, but we all forget that we experience it in our lives as well, and while some are more aware of it than others, it doesn't make it any less true. No matter where we are in life, we will feel this feeling again and again as we move forward in our lives and professions and while it sucks, it is a part of life that we have to accept no matter what it makes us feel.
If there is anything you take away from reading this, it is that no matter where you are in your life, friends will unfortunately come and go. However, we can either choose to stay sad about it every time we feel it or we can acknowledge it and face it with the knowledge that everyone has experienced this at least once in their life. No matter what, you will always meet new people who you will undoubtedly form connections with and befriend to the point you forget about the feeling.
